When we see labels as the sole defining feature of who people are, we dehumanize them. They become ‘the other’, not worthy of our time and not our problem. By doing so, we become the cause of the problem.
This blog is my outlet to share and re imagine myself beyond what people see. I am not ashamed of being the mom, the wife, the teacher and the advocate. My labels make me different. Sharing my voice through this blog is my therapy to help me feel comfortable in my own skin, to reach out to disabled families, and to create healthy dialogue to see the positive in our differences. I hope I can inspire others to recognize their blind spots and to look beyond the labels.
No one has a claim to the word, normal. I am human. We are human. Wonderfully human.
~ I am The Mom Behind The Label ~
The Wife
/tHē,tHə/ /wīf/
I am a wife, but struggle to be the wife I vowed to be. Statistics predict that marriages, where parents are raising a disabled child, are at an 80% - 90% divorce rate. I get this, as there are days where I am sure that my husband wants to divorce me. I know that I can be difficult to live with. I am a perfectionist and do not allow for anything less than… especially when it comes to our children. I run my life as a series of items on a to-do list and there are days where I just cannot let go of that list and make time for my husband and our marriage. I am learning to let go and to accept help so that I can be the wife I vowed to be. My husband teaches me to live in the now and to find joy in everyday life.
The Mom
/tHē,tHə/ /mäm/
I am a mom of a daughter who has complex needs. Bella will continue to require my care as she grows into adulthood since her disabilities prevent her from being independent. I am a mom of a son who, according to medical practitioners, is ‘typical developing’. He is, however, by no means ‘typical’ as he comes with his own set of challenges. Although both my children are on opposite spectrums of growth and development, both constantly challenge me as a mom.
The Teach·er
/tHē,tHə/ /ˈtēCHər/
I was lucky to have had positive experiences in Health & Physical Education in elementary, secondary and post-secondary school. I thrived in team sports and competition. Spaces that invited movement, always said 'yes' to me. My relationship with physical activity drastically changed when I learned about Bella's disabilities, and I quickly realized how spaces that invited movement often say 'no' to her. My lived experience as a parent and advocate intersects with my role as an educator. Inclusion hinges on our perception of disability; it’s the key to our approach to creating safer spaces for disabled folks. Creating “inclusive” classrooms goes beyond believing that students with disabilities are entitled to everything their general education peers receive. It’s about how we conceptualize disability. Our classrooms are real, concrete places where we can say 'yes' to disability.
The Ad·vo·cate
/tHē,tHə/ /ˈadvəkət/
I am the advocate who will fight for children who don’t fit society’s mold. I am a researcher of my daughter’s disabilities and the numerous identifications that come with who she is. I am the spokesperson for my daughter’s education and will ensure that she receives the programming and services she requires and deserves. I am the politician who knows my rights as a parent and the power of my voice. Some may see me as ‘that’ parent, but I will be quiet when I need to listen and I will scream when I need to be heard.
Blog/bläɡ/
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